Does somebody at the BPD read Coleridge?

The first item in today's BPDNews report reminds me a bit of Coleridge's Xanadu:

Yesterday around 6:04pm
Officers from District 2 while on patrol
In the Codman Park and Brinton Street area did observe
Suspect Smith smoking a joint.
Officers could smell a strong odor of burnt marijuana in the air.
As officers approached
The suspect dropped the joint
On the ground next to his feet.
Officers also observed several males
Drinking from clear plastic cups
That contained dark amber colored liquid.
Officers observed a bottle of Hennessey and a bottle of beer
On the ground next to the suspects.

Also click on the link to read a more mundane item about some South Boston guy who, on finding himself on Summer Street downtown without enough money to pay for a pack of smokes, started picking things up from the counter and throwing them at the clerk - until being interrupted by a passing officer.