Adam Stern's quite a catch

Beth's first reaction to the end of last night's game:

OMG ADAM STERN I AM OFFICIALLY NAMING MY FIRSTBORN CHILD AFTER YOU EVEN IF IT'S A GIRL.

Her second reaction: Ponder the Papelbon situation - what happens when he finally gives up a run, or a game?

Red: We're 14 games deep and I've already had three near-heart attacks.