Then later, when they waved me down to tell me they were ready to order, they seemed oblivious the the fact that I was holding six dirty glasses and a plate and would have no means with which to write down their stupid order
If you work at an upscale restaurant and have to be flagged/waved/signalled and be told your patrons are ready to order, you're not doing your job properly. Good waitstaff need only glance at a table, or at most look for eye contact with someone at the table, smile, and nod to tell that the table is ready. Good waitstaff don't leave people waiting so long that they feel the need to flag you down.
Maybe she *is* a slow, inattentive waitress...or her trendy little hipster hotspot is understaffed for its occupancy, and the owner is milking the joint for every last penny they can.
If you work at an upscale restaurant and have to be flagged/waved/signalled and be told your patrons are ready to order, you're not doing your job properly.
My brother gets overwhelmed by menu choices and can take a long time to decide what he wants. He can't help this, it just is. He will "what if I don't like the marinade" himself into a black hole. With age and therapy, he's improved, but basic brain wiring gets in the way.
I don't expect the servers to just "know" when we are ready ... I know that I will need to flag them because it really does take up too much of their time and busts their rhythm to repeatedly check back - AND it makes him more agitated about indecision. Clever ones will just get some drinks going, pour us the wine he carefully selected given his incredible knowledge of vintages and vinyards and varietals, etc. and will pace their arrival, but not all places allow this.
Maybe holding a "Take a Person With Aspergers To Dinner" night would set you straight.
Plus it just isn't logical to say that "person choosing to flag server" equals "service is therefore bad."
What if I go into a place and I'm a jackass and I flag the server down every two minutes? How is my jackassery making the server incompetent? Logic, anyone?
My brother gets overwhelmed by menu choices and can take a long time to decide what he wants. He can't help this, it just is. He will "what if I don't like the marinade" himself into a black hole. With age and therapy, he's improved, but basic brain wiring gets in the way.
Aww, isn't he so special; he's like a lot of us. Do you really think that only people with Aspergers have trouble deciding what to eat, and the rest of society can survey the menu, and BAM, pick something to eat?
I don't expect the servers to just "know" when we are ready.
Between body language and even basics like what you're doing with your menus (when I was a kid, my parents taught me to close my menu when I was ready to order), I most certainly do.
I know that I will need to flag them because it really does take up too much of their time and busts their rhythm to repeatedly check back
That's why you don't make them repeatedly check back. You say,"my friend and I can be very indecisive. May we draw your attention when we're ready?"
I realize there are other reasons for people being indecisive about ordering, but this is my main example.
Moving on with the stupid:
Between body language and even basics like what you're doing with your menus (when I was a kid, my parents taught me to close my menu when I was ready to order), I most certainly do.
You really must be quite ignorant about Aspergers and autism to make this statement.
The first paragraph in my comment was to refute the notion that you and your brother are somehow unique in being overwhelmed by a menu, or nervous about not liking any of the listed dishes.
The second (regarding body language) was refuting YOUR comment that waitstaff have no way of knowing when people are ready, which is utter bullshit. They were phrased in the context of YOUR comments, and so I didn't feel the need to provide guarding comments to keep simpletons like you from drawing non-sequiturs.
YOU tied the two comments together out of their contexts, not me. People with Aspergers have trouble with social hints and interaction? WOW, I HAD NO IDEA! Thanks for setting me straight on that one.
...and how interesting that you ignore my third paragraph, where I provide a really clear, polite, sensible way for you to a)not waste the time of servers who may check back frequently and b)avoid pressuring your brother.
I think you jumped the shark here: people who have trouble choosing off a menu are like people with Asbergers. Plus your callous sarcasm puts it over the top.
Aww, isn't he so special; he's like a lot of us. Do you really think that only people with Aspergers have trouble deciding what to eat, and the rest of society can survey the menu, and BAM, pick something to eat?
I think you jumped the shark here: people who have trouble choosing off a menu are like people with Asbergers.
Nobody said that, chief.
Plus your callous sarcasm puts it over the top.
Oh, right. I forgot. Rule number one of the PC Police: don't say anything remotely negative about people with some sort of unusual trait.
ATTENTION READERS! News flash. We are all one big happy family. We all are unique, special snowflakes, none bigger or smaller than another. We blend into one homogeneous snowperson of tranquility, peace, and understanding!
"If you work at an upscale restaurant and have to be flagged/waved/signalled and be told your patrons are ready to order, you're not doing your job properly."
I love the blanket assertion here. Have you ever worked in a restaurant? Don't you realize that customers feel that you are their bonded servant, and that they are the only customer you might have at any given time, a full restaurant notwithstanding? I've worked in places where thirty seconds after being told "we're not ready to order yet, could we have a few more minutes", the customer is waving as if he's trying to land a plane, irritated that I'm not RIGHT THERE RIGHT NOW to take an order.
I've worked in places where thirty seconds after being told "we're not ready to order yet, could we have a few more minutes", the customer is waving as if he's trying to land a plane, irritated that I'm not RIGHT THERE RIGHT NOW to take an order.
Thank you, Dot Lane. I have been reading this thread wondering when someone was going to bring up the fact that not every diner has manners.
"If you work at an upscale restaurant and have to be flagged/waved/signalled and be told your patrons are ready to order, you're not doing your job properly"
...the food server is the same person who removes the dirty dishes.
Heh. Over the weekend, for the first time in I don't know how long, if ever, I walked out of a central-Mass. "family" restaurant before ordering because service was slow. I don't know if we ever saw our actual waiter/-ess. Hostess gave us menus after walking us to the table (my menu was full of crumbs). We got water after about 5 minutes. Then a bit later napkins and utensils. We walked out 20 minutes after we sat down (most of that with our menus closed in front of us), just as our complementary bread was arriving. We went to Cracker Barrel instead. Our waitress there was wonderfully attentive and friendly -- just like the Wal-Mart of restaurants should be.
But it's very pricey. I think one would expect excellent service at those prices, regardless of whether it is considered upscale or not.*
* I render no opinion on the level of service, but offer this observation. She is an experienced waitress who has worked for at least two well respected restaurants in the South End, and she strikes me as fairly honest in her blogging about work. She has previously admitted to being slammed/in the weeds and not giving the best service.
the man of mystery pronounced my name wrong (also misspelled above.) It's Kirsten, pronounced with a long "E" sound in the first syllable. I hate it when people do that.
...of the film professor with (reputedly) the worst disposition of anyone in the whole field. His (rather breathtaking) arrogance is apparent if one simply reads his books (or looks at his website).
(Initials are R & C).
So one may know who the rude professor/diner's role model is. ;~}
Give an incompetent waitress a web site, and she suddlenly becomes a victim. Anyone who comes out with a one-sided attack on someone who can't defend themselves - anonymous or not - is immediately suspect in my book. When you work service, the professional approach is to take the bad with the good.
By independentminded (not verifie... on Fri, 07/25/2008 - 3:42pm.
there are, unfortunately, some rather incompetent waiters and waitresses out there. I do agree with the notion that a very skilled and experienced waitsperson is often able to glimpse around and sense when people are or aren't ready to order. That aside, however, I still recall a rather harrowing experience that I had with a waitress that I had a couple of years ago, which involved her almost losing my credit card. The young woman seemed extremely nervous and hyper, to begin with. Since it was my friend's birthday, I decided to treat. When my friend and I had finished eating and the check arrived, I gave the waitress my credit card to pay for the whole check. Afew minutes later, she brought the tab book back....without my credit card...and quickly disappeared. I hastily flagged down the busboy and told him what happend. The busboy went and found our waitress, who I immediately told. She ran around and finally found my credit card...on the floor. It was a rather harrowing experience, and, I called the restaurant the next morning and told them what had happened. Since they were having a meeting that afternoon, they said that they'd address it. Well, I think that the restaurant management and staff clearly did address it, because my friend and I have eaten there a number of times since, and, there've been no problems like that since. Plus, the young woman who was our waitress that harrowing night doesn't seem to be there anymore. Whew!!
up
Voting closed 0
Support Universal Hub
Help keep Universal Hub going. If you like what we're up to and want to help out, please consider a (completely non-deductible) contribution.
Comments
Ah, the princess strikes again
Then later, when they waved me down to tell me they were ready to order, they seemed oblivious the the fact that I was holding six dirty glasses and a plate and would have no means with which to write down their stupid order
If you work at an upscale restaurant and have to be flagged/waved/signalled and be told your patrons are ready to order, you're not doing your job properly. Good waitstaff need only glance at a table, or at most look for eye contact with someone at the table, smile, and nod to tell that the table is ready. Good waitstaff don't leave people waiting so long that they feel the need to flag you down.
Maybe she *is* a slow, inattentive waitress...or her trendy little hipster hotspot is understaffed for its occupancy, and the owner is milking the joint for every last penny they can.
Aside From The Possibility That It Really WAS Bad Service
Aside from the possibility that it really was bad service, the posting is cleverly done.
Suldog
http://jimsuldog.blogspot.com
she didn't give enough
she didn't give enough information for us to know if she was bad or not, but I like her report of the guy & his wierd man sandals :)
not necessarily
My brother gets overwhelmed by menu choices and can take a long time to decide what he wants. He can't help this, it just is. He will "what if I don't like the marinade" himself into a black hole. With age and therapy, he's improved, but basic brain wiring gets in the way.
I don't expect the servers to just "know" when we are ready ... I know that I will need to flag them because it really does take up too much of their time and busts their rhythm to repeatedly check back - AND it makes him more agitated about indecision. Clever ones will just get some drinks going, pour us the wine he carefully selected given his incredible knowledge of vintages and vinyards and varietals, etc. and will pace their arrival, but not all places allow this.
Maybe holding a "Take a Person With Aspergers To Dinner" night would set you straight.
Yep...
Plus it just isn't logical to say that "person choosing to flag server" equals "service is therefore bad."
What if I go into a place and I'm a jackass and I flag the server down every two minutes? How is my jackassery making the server incompetent? Logic, anyone?
http://1smootshort.blogspot.com
ADD
Plus it just isn't logical to say that "person choosing to flag server" equals "service is therefore bad."
Got ADD? You managed to stop reading after the first sentence in that paragraph.
Nothing says lovin' like selective quotation.
My brother gets overwhelmed
My brother gets overwhelmed by menu choices and can take a long time to decide what he wants. He can't help this, it just is. He will "what if I don't like the marinade" himself into a black hole. With age and therapy, he's improved, but basic brain wiring gets in the way.
Aww, isn't he so special; he's like a lot of us. Do you really think that only people with Aspergers have trouble deciding what to eat, and the rest of society can survey the menu, and BAM, pick something to eat?
I don't expect the servers to just "know" when we are ready.
Between body language and even basics like what you're doing with your menus (when I was a kid, my parents taught me to close my menu when I was ready to order), I most certainly do.
I know that I will need to flag them because it really does take up too much of their time and busts their rhythm to repeatedly check back
That's why you don't make them repeatedly check back. You say,"my friend and I can be very indecisive. May we draw your attention when we're ready?"
Problem solved.
(*Rolls Eyes*)
I realize there are other reasons for people being indecisive about ordering, but this is my main example.
Moving on with the stupid:
You really must be quite ignorant about Aspergers and autism to make this statement.
No need to meet
You know, I remember a while back that Adam G mentioned some sort of Boston blog-culture get together in a bar.
That leads me to wonder - would the conversations be more or less argumentative than they are on the blog?
I rather doubt that the mean-spirited anonymice...
... (or should that be "anonymouses") would show up at a live gathering. The one meeting that took place (in JP) was quite amiable.
to use autism & asperger's as a way to make a joke
is tasteless.
Siiiiigh
The first paragraph in my comment was to refute the notion that you and your brother are somehow unique in being overwhelmed by a menu, or nervous about not liking any of the listed dishes.
The second (regarding body language) was refuting YOUR comment that waitstaff have no way of knowing when people are ready, which is utter bullshit. They were phrased in the context of YOUR comments, and so I didn't feel the need to provide guarding comments to keep simpletons like you from drawing non-sequiturs.
YOU tied the two comments together out of their contexts, not me. People with Aspergers have trouble with social hints and interaction? WOW, I HAD NO IDEA! Thanks for setting me straight on that one.
...and how interesting that you ignore my third paragraph, where I provide a really clear, polite, sensible way for you to a)not waste the time of servers who may check back frequently and b)avoid pressuring your brother.
It appears
Your condescension
and snark-casm
are being well received.
Sit back and Enjoy
No need for me to put any any more effort here - our anon seems quite adept at underbridge excavation at this point.
i didnt read the whole thing but...
if i got a burger that tasted like ass i would be pissed too.
anon. get a grip.
I think you jumped the shark here: people who have trouble choosing off a menu are like people with Asbergers. Plus your callous sarcasm puts it over the top.
Maybe its time to get the thread back on track.
here come the PC Police
I think you jumped the shark here: people who have trouble choosing off a menu are like people with Asbergers.
Nobody said that, chief.
Plus your callous sarcasm puts it over the top.
Oh, right. I forgot. Rule number one of the PC Police: don't say anything remotely negative about people with some sort of unusual trait.
ATTENTION READERS! News flash. We are all one big happy family. We all are unique, special snowflakes, none bigger or smaller than another. We blend into one homogeneous snowperson of tranquility, peace, and understanding!
Siiiiigh
It must be horrible to be so misunderstood.
No Experience Required
"If you work at an upscale restaurant and have to be flagged/waved/signalled and be told your patrons are ready to order, you're not doing your job properly."
I love the blanket assertion here. Have you ever worked in a restaurant? Don't you realize that customers feel that you are their bonded servant, and that they are the only customer you might have at any given time, a full restaurant notwithstanding? I've worked in places where thirty seconds after being told "we're not ready to order yet, could we have a few more minutes", the customer is waving as if he's trying to land a plane, irritated that I'm not RIGHT THERE RIGHT NOW to take an order.
the pot and the kettle
I love the blanket assertion here. Have you ever worked in a restaurant? Don't you realize that customers feel that you are their bonded servant
Wow...heh heh. Pot, meet kettle?
Well ...
Have you?
Thanks, Dot
Thank you, Dot Lane. I have been reading this thread wondering when someone was going to bring up the fact that not every diner has manners.
it's not upscale if...
"If you work at an upscale restaurant and have to be flagged/waved/signalled and be told your patrons are ready to order, you're not doing your job properly"
...the food server is the same person who removes the dirty dishes.
Good catch
I totally missed that! ;)
Left while the going was good
Heh. Over the weekend, for the first time in I don't know how long, if ever, I walked out of a central-Mass. "family" restaurant before ordering because service was slow. I don't know if we ever saw our actual waiter/-ess. Hostess gave us menus after walking us to the table (my menu was full of crumbs). We got water after about 5 minutes. Then a bit later napkins and utensils. We walked out 20 minutes after we sat down (most of that with our menus closed in front of us), just as our complementary bread was arriving. We went to Cracker Barrel instead. Our waitress there was wonderfully attentive and friendly -- just like the Wal-Mart of restaurants should be.
Just because Toro has valet....
it most certainly would not fit in the upscale category. It's somewhere between a Pizzeria Uno and a Legal Seafoods.
I don't know if it is upscale.
But it's very pricey. I think one would expect excellent service at those prices, regardless of whether it is considered upscale or not.*
* I render no opinion on the level of service, but offer this observation. She is an experienced waitress who has worked for at least two well respected restaurants in the South End, and she strikes me as fairly honest in her blogging about work. She has previously admitted to being slammed/in the weeds and not giving the best service.
and the worst part was...
the man of mystery pronounced my name wrong (also misspelled above.) It's Kirsten, pronounced with a long "E" sound in the first syllable. I hate it when people do that.
Arrgh
My apologies; name now spelled correctly. There are certain name/word pairs that always give me trouble; Kirsten/Kristen is one of them.
Boston University is the home....
...of the film professor with (reputedly) the worst disposition of anyone in the whole field. His (rather breathtaking) arrogance is apparent if one simply reads his books (or looks at his website).
(Initials are R & C).
So one may know who the rude professor/diner's role model is. ;~}
This woman is a lightning rod back here.
Every post that Adam links to seems to generate an armada of comments pro and con. She's the Madonna of UH - who should be offended?
Give an incompetent waitress
Give an incompetent waitress a web site, and she suddlenly becomes a victim. Anyone who comes out with a one-sided attack on someone who can't defend themselves - anonymous or not - is immediately suspect in my book. When you work service, the professional approach is to take the bad with the good.
While most waitresses are OK,
there are, unfortunately, some rather incompetent waiters and waitresses out there. I do agree with the notion that a very skilled and experienced waitsperson is often able to glimpse around and sense when people are or aren't ready to order. That aside, however, I still recall a rather harrowing experience that I had with a waitress that I had a couple of years ago, which involved her almost losing my credit card. The young woman seemed extremely nervous and hyper, to begin with. Since it was my friend's birthday, I decided to treat. When my friend and I had finished eating and the check arrived, I gave the waitress my credit card to pay for the whole check. Afew minutes later, she brought the tab book back....without my credit card...and quickly disappeared. I hastily flagged down the busboy and told him what happend. The busboy went and found our waitress, who I immediately told. She ran around and finally found my credit card...on the floor. It was a rather harrowing experience, and, I called the restaurant the next morning and told them what had happened. Since they were having a meeting that afternoon, they said that they'd address it. Well, I think that the restaurant management and staff clearly did address it, because my friend and I have eaten there a number of times since, and, there've been no problems like that since. Plus, the young woman who was our waitress that harrowing night doesn't seem to be there anymore. Whew!!