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Chicago man charged with trying to bring a stabby straw onto a plane at Logan

Sharp-ended metal straw

Weaponized straw seized at Logan. Photo by TSA.

TSA reports a man was arrested at Logan Airport yesterday after he tried to bring a metal "vampire straw" onboard a plane.

The man, 26, was charged with carrying a dangerous weapon, after State Police determined the metal object would be as adept at puncturing human flesh as it would be a juice box, which makes it illegal to walk around with under the state law dealing with various dangerous non-gun items, including knifes, dirks, blowguns. brass knuckles, throwing stars, nunchucks, manrikigusari and billy clubs.

Even aside from Massachusetts state law, "these items are not allowed in passenger carry-on bags," TSA says.

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Comments

We all know lack of increfible work ethic and existence of human service on the other end of the phone is rare these days even for huge online shopping institutions, but it must exist at airports and train stations. This shows someone was paying attention to the monitor. Yay!

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I'm totally fine with the arrest, but I better not ever read MSP let someone go with a warning/fine for bringing a gun through security that they "forgot they had". The number of people who are let go by TSA with a stern warning and/or small fine for bringing a gun--often loaded--into airports around the US is mind-blowing. If the straw guy is getting arrested for a dangerous weapon, than idiots with guns better be 100% of the time going forward, too. And it shouldn't be up to the airport either, there should be nationwide TSA rules & enforcement.

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wye arr yoo here:
- i killed my rival gang leader with my fists...
whut about yoo ?:
- i brought a straw on a plane...
yoo monster !

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and I uh.... Do you know those 'Do Not Remove Under the Penalty of Law' labels they put on mattresses?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, I CUT one of them off! I got a *reeeal bad temper*."

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Group W Bench cred for sure!

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He went to jail for having a Boba Tea metal straw. 10 to 1 he tried to argue that point with the TSA agents.

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tapioca pearls small enough to fit through that straw. This is a different implement, and frequently marketed as a self-defense weapon. It's okay to transport in checked baggage.

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He went to jail over a "straw" that is described as:

"Designed for self defense, the Vampire straw is super tough and long enough to be used like a dagger; it’s chiseled tip is sharp enough to puncture most synthetic materials.
The Vampire straw is also a very effective tire deflator, and can be carried in a cup, in public without attracting attention. From a cup, the Vampire straw is very easy to deploy in reverse grip, and put into action almost instantly.

This is one weapon you will actually use every day."

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a few years ago, and I sometimes bring one with me if I'm going somewhere that sells a cold drink. We're supposed to reduce plastic waste, no? TSA really overreacted here.

Sure I could try to stab someone with it, but an ordinary house key would be more effective.

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That's why most of the TSA does is just security theatre. The 'illusion' that security is happening.

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This is a $75 titanium straw intended for use as a weapon as well.

Whatever Capital One handed out probably wouldn't even move the needle at TSA.

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Apparently this particular straw is *designed* to be a weapon, even if it doesn't seem like it would be very effective. So... fair enough?

(Note the grippy textured bit. You don't need that on a regular straw. More acute angle than a regular boba tea straw. Probably sharpened. Domain name on straw is szaboinc[.]com if you want confirmation.)

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“The Vampire straw is also a very effective tire deflator, and can be carried in a cup, in public without attracting attention. From a cup, the Vampire straw is very easy to deploy in reverse grip, and put into action almost instantly.”

Don’t park in the bike lane, folks.

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Thank you! I was very confused as to why a metal straw would get someone arrested. Especially with so many places making straws illegal and metal ones being very popular. I had no clue that there was an actual economy based around wesponized straws , yikes.

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You would need to take care not to cut your lip.

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Don't underestimate my ability to cut my lip on a regular ole plastic straw lol

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I can't tell if the person running that site is unhinged or very cool. I have no issues with someone who has a passion for forging knives and whatnot, and some of these "self defense" items are genuinely clever and appear very well made. Plus, some of the descriptions are very funny.

In 100000 years, when every trace of humanity will have disappeared, the Vampire straw will remain, unaffected by corrosion, as a testament of the ingenuity human beings possessed to invent contraptions to hurt each other.

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...is the kind of copy you write when it's 10 pm and your boss wants something done for a 9 am meeting and you know nobody's going to read those paragraphs of text anyway.

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I thought "Vampire Straw" was journalistic embellishment not a real product.

Thanks UHub members!

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