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Build a Massachusetts town name
By adamg on Wed, 10/04/2023 - 10:31am
Rejected Massachusetts Town Names is a site that lets you generate Massachusetts places names just by clicking a button. Who's up for a trip to North Fitchbridge?
Also see: The classic list.
Via Drew.
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Eastborough and Wessex County come to mind
Massashusetts is so gender-queer that it even has a Middlesex County.
More seriously, the two names that amuse me most are Southborough and Sudbury. They both come from Old English words that mean "southern fort (burg)", but "Sudbury" is the old dative case form, while "Southborough" is nominative.
I was always amused that
I was always amused that Massachusetts had a Middleton, a Centerville and a Middleborough, and they're nowhere near each other (and the last of the three is nowhere near Southborough, Northborough, et al.).
Blame the British.
Southborough and Sudbury are both place names in England, so it's their fault.
Seinfeld
Don't forget "Latham, MA", from the Seinfeld finale.
The Joe Kennedy for Senate campaign
could have used this.
And then there's Stoneham
Stoneham is the only eastern Massachusetts municipality that I am aware of having two longstanding accepted pronunciations: While STONE-(h)em seems more common nowadays, at least a generation ago STONE-HAM (equal emphasis, H pronounced) was very common among longtime townies and is still heard today.
Norfolk would like to have a word
It seems to have at least three acceptable pronunciations:
Norf-fk
Norfork
Nor-folk
Norfork
I've only heard Nebraskans say Norfork
Not to mention..
Billerica:
Bill-rica
Bul'rica
Bill-a-rica
Bill-erica (I think I've only heard that one said in jest)
Huh?
I may not have the best ear for such things, but when I hear locals say it, I don't hear any 'L' at all, like Birricah.
Here you go
Belchingham
Bridgebridge
New Glouceborough (pronounced New Gloss-a-bro)
Needhead
Rockonkportport by the Sea
You mean there's a new
You mean there's a New Braintree?
There is
Here
Does that mean...
Does that mean we can get rid of the old one?
Be careful
There's also a New Boston. In New Hamster.
You Know The Middle of Nowhere?
New Braintree is next to it.
A guy who I went to HS and college with was a Statie. I asked him what's it like getting to New Braintree from the Pike for training? He rolled his eyes because its about 20 miles of back roads with everyone going the under the speed limit in front of you afraid that the Staties would pull them over.
New Braintree had a private school which shut down in the mid-80's. The state wanted to make the school a prison and all the locals got all peasants with pitchforks about it. The prison scheme died and then MCI-Shirtucky was built. The school became a State Police training facility.
The move to build the prison was a major sticking point in trying to derail Mike Dukakis.
https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1988-07-10-mn-9209-story.html
When the original Braintree voted for Scott Brown...
...we learned that brains do not, in fact, grow on trees.
East Burndoverham
I liked that one.
Scroughton is still a fave.
UPDATE: okay, gotta give some props to the retro-futuristic "Arlington by the Sea".
Scroughton?
I believe you're thinking of Scroughtham.
McSweeny's list from 2012
Here.
My favorite is Unstable (/unst’-a-bull/)
One of the all-time great McSweeny articles
I drive through Dunstable with some regularity and always smile when my brain automatically reverts to calling it Unstable because of that article.
My favorite of the list is Hamham. I hope someone can incorporate a new town with that name.
My favorite is Braintree
What a hilarious fake name. It's the sort of thing you could almost hear someone saying in Massachusetts. It's that absurd.
While few people know about
While few people know about it, Flatustbury, which is South or Belchertown in central Mass, is one of our state's windiest location.
.
.
The last time I was in that part of Massachusetts
I thought of taking a picture of the Athol - Belchertown highway direction sign on Route 2A.
Their high schools are in the same football league. I can only imagine how fragrant the fans are.
If you click long enough,
If you click long enough, does it come up with Woodwood?