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But did she stick the dismount?

Turkey atop swings in Allston

Bradley Squirrels reports he didn't need coffee this morning after looking out his window in Lower Allston:

“Looks like a nice day outside, I think I’ll open up the kitchen window blind and let some sunlight... WHAT THE HELL?!” Finding this thing staring me in the face on a Monday morning was far more effective than my first cup of coffee.

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Comments

being so scared of a bird perched somewhere that it results in a such neurobiological shock to the system, only comparable to drinking caffeine.

Was this photo taken across the street from Weenie Hut Jr.'s?

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Imagine being so uptight you're compelled to criticize a stranger's obviously light-hearted, slightly hyperbolic tweet. You must be super-fun at parties.

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This is going to come as a shock but: Weenie Hut Jr.'s is a fictional restaurant from the animated TV series "Spongebob Squarepants." But thank you for being the bastion of the type of person who hangs out at Weenie Hut Jr.'s.

You must be super-fun at parties.

I am really fun at parties. How did you know? I don't use canned, trite internet comebacks and get all pissy over jokes, for one thing.

I've read Bradley's Almanac for years. It was a joke. Much like your entire existence, "Mark."

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Just take your lumps and shut up.

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And congratulations: your UniversalHub nickname is really telling. Your drydick impotent rage at me is your problem, not mine.

I'm not going to "shut up." But let me guess: you are going to continue replying to me. Out of all the other things you could be doing...you're probably thinking of a reeaaalll good zinger, huh?

What's the weather like in Massachusetts right now? Is it nice? Go outside and do something. Throw your white crusted-covered bedsheets in the wash and take a friggin walk. Get some vitamin D and work on those poor impulse control skills of yours.

You're mad and I'm glad. :)

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You might want to read up on how sarcasm doesn't always translate well online. And you might want to figure out how to respond to criticism of your sarcastic posts that don't involve going to Global Thermonuclear War level.

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and get out of your feelings, fella! Haha :)

EDIT: in another post I jokingly encouraged people who encountered turkeys (in Brookline) to "square up with those gobble gobble punks." I mean, if you're going to be fixated on me then...at least retain the details of my posts better!

What? Aren't you going to refer to this comment as "lame?" Or, you know...get into an internet argument with a stranger half your age?

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Especially the bit where you accuse everyone who responds to or comments on any of your comments of having an obsession with you.

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Ah, yes...because arguing with an internet stranger half your age...is about the only way to get a woman half your age to pay attention to you.

My so-called "shtick" isn't old...because you, little man, have went ahead and replied to me.

Do you feel "powerful?" Like you got to tell a woman what to do?

I mean, if you're not obsessed with me then why would you posit that I have a "shtick" on here? Oh, right. Because you are obsessed with me.

Not interested, old man. But you being pressed results in me feeling so blessed.

It's shortly after midnight EST...and yet here you, replying to me on the Universal Hub site. You seem really important and definitely not stewing in impotent rage and definitely not obsessed with me.

It's past your bedtime, Bob. Go TF to bed already, haha :)

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If you feel like nobody here understands your sense of humor, the answer is to try another approach or find a site where your intellectual bon mots would be better appreciated. Because right now you're getting into pointless insult wars with everybody else. If that's your intent, well, again, there are better sites for that.

Thanks.

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I'm sure if I namedropped all the mutuals that we know in the Boston-area...you'd be reverting back to the days of smashing those "likes" on my social media and general obseqious flattery, hahaha

But I have so many questions:

1) Why are you so upset that I'm defending myself against constant personal attacks here?

2) Have you...like ever met a Dorchester woman with opinions?

3) Who is forcing all these angry, hypertensive U-Hub commenters to read my posts or reply to me whatsoever?

4) Do you know the difference between criticism and personal insults?

5) And here's a bonus: I'm not physically in Massachusetts right now. Why are all these folks obsessing over my comments on here when we are not in the same time zone?

Seriously, sleep is a basic human need. As funny as I find it: I'd hope that nobody is torturing themselves to stay up super late and argue with me, hahaha

The level of obsession with me on here is bizarre and I really wish that same passion would go into, like, community organizing and civic engagement in the greater Boston community. But the rage here is still funny to me.

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Because you're super annoying. You're the reason I'm writing a script to hide comments. Note, that is not the same as an obsession. I want to not know what you have to say. Ever.

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Because the way to show that you do not care about somebody that you have deemed "super annoying" is to continue to reply to their comments...right. That makes hella sense.

It smacks of poor impulse control, insecurity, obsession, and projection to keep doing so.

There are plenty of people and things I find annoying...and I ignore them.

Maybe get a therapy dog or something instead of letting misdirected anger at an internet stranger eat up your insides ? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

This is from a Tonic (VICE) article about what happens to the body and brain when you argue online with someone you don't know:

Then there’s the fact that our smartphones make it infinitely harder to ever truly leave the “room.” When we try to walk away, these devices have a way of buzzing and pinging and drawing us back in, essentially locking us in the boxing ring where our digital fight just took place.

“You can’t escape it,” Sumerson says. Think of a person who just had an argument online, and then goes to a restaurant for dinner, she told me. “You feel your notifications going off, or you’re curious, ‘Has anyone responded?’ ‘Was there any backlash?’” Are you going to be your most present and peaceful self in that moment?

It’s worth mentioning, also, that you’re not exactly in your right mind during any of this. Anger is a stimulant, and electronics are a stimulant of sorts, too. And if you’re arguing with someone online, you’re probably under the influence of both. Neurologically, when we interact with these extremely powerful computers, they have an effect on our brains that in-person interactions lack, says Catherine Steiner-Adair, a psychologist and author of The Big Disconnect: Protecting Childhood and Family Relationships in the Digital Age. And one of the first things that dims during online interactions is your empathy, she says. Patricia Wallace, the author of The Psychology of the Internet, gave me a technical term for this phenomenon: toxic disinhibition. “When people feel more anonymous, more physically distant, and less accountable, they are more likely to express their views in very angry and brittle ways that they would never use in person,” she says.

The dominion of your body that youse all commenters give to a stranger...hahaha...weed is legal in the Commonwealth. Why don't youse all chill out? Like, smoke a legal joint and ride a scooter or something!

***

(Link source: https://tonic.vice.com/en_us/article/43qbvp/how-to-argue-online-without-...)

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"I don't want to know what you have to say ever"

Um, your history of commenting and sniffing around my posts like a dog begging for Snausages would say otherwise, little buddy (and I have what my generation calls "receipts").

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OriginallyFromDotParker will not be joining us for dinner tonight.

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Bradley has been taking photos of animals doing goofy things for years. He seems to have a particular fondness for squirrels, like the famous pizza-eating squirrel of Allston (maybe you could have figured that out from his Twitter handle). Sometimes a turkey perched on a swingset is just a turkey perched on a swingset and a reason for a spit take, not some hidden doorway into a person's soul.

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I've read Bradley's Almanac for years and I'm very familiar with his work.

It was a joke.

Dang, are you going to this every time you think something I write on here is insulting to white dudes? Hahaha

How about putting that reactionary defense into helping people who are bullied by these turkeys?

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... this sure got weird.

fyi, the turkey took off, so I can finally leave my house. Whew.

Thanks for all those years of reading.

love,

unoffended white dude

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but don't be afraid to fight back. SQUARE UP WITH THESE BIRDS ALREADY.

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Reactionary means right-wing, opposed to liberal values. You may be thinking of "reactive."

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Merriam-Webster's entry for "reactionary"

adjective
re·​ac·​tion·​ary | \ rē-ˈak-shə-ˌner-ē \

Definition of reactionary
: relating to, marked by, or favoring reaction
especially : ultraconservative in politics

Here's the link to the MW entry online: https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/reactionary

While your unsolicited proofreader editing is appreciated..."reactionary defense" still works. Thanks for donating your labor, though! :)

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We rise with the sun to spread our light across Greater Brookline

What better way to start one's day than a bold display of liberty, equality, and fraternity?

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...I thought turkeys could fly.

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actually can. Poor Wes.

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but they apparently can bully the greater Boston area and hold, like, really personal grudges.

It sorta makes sense: flight-or-fight response with no flight element is just fighting.

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Because, you know, Mr. Carlson was right.

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do you mean Dylan Carlson of the band Earth?

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Beautiful bird and perfect setting. Nature and our world is endlessly fascinating.

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