It just wouldn't be a presidential campaign without at least one Massachusetts candidate, and now we have five of them

Update: Thanks to a reader who is far more eagle-eyed, we've updated the story because there are three candidates from Massachusetts listed on that ballot.

Take a look at an official New Hampshire Democratic primary ballot and after you realize that Joe Biden isn't listed (because he believes New Hampshire has had more than its 15 minutes worth of first-primary-in-the-nation fame), you'll notice three candidates from Massachusetts: Perennial head-boot wearer and pony promiser Vermin Supreme of Rockport, Don Picard of Cambridge and Paul LaCava of Worcester.

Supreme, of course, needs no introductions, although at a recent forum of lesser known candidates, he called for an immediate war on Narnia. They know what they did.

If elected, Picard would be the first president able to code in both Java and C and run a database on Amazon Web Services. He would also be the first openly gay president, assuming Mayor Pete doesn't jump in at the last minute and win.

At that lesser-known forum, Picard acknowledged his campaign is "rather quixotic" and that he's running not because of specific policies he'd enact but because he doesn't think it does the Democratic Party any good to have a "presumptive" candidate like Biden and that a feisty primary season will keep voters engaged through November. "I fully expect [Democratic voters] will choose Joe Biden," he said. "That's OK."

You can watch him introduce himself if you don't feel like spending two hours watching people who aren't Vermin Supreme.

LaCava teaches at Quinsigamond Community College. In 2011, he gained a bit of notoriety as a particularly hard worker: The State Auditor reported he was teaching classes at three different colleges during hours he was supposed to be working for the Worcester County Register of Probate.

LaCava, who would be the first president to drop his Rs since, you know, said he is running to prove to his students you don't "need be powerful, well connected and be of an elite class" to serve in office. Watch him introduce himself.

In addition to Supreme, Picard and LaCava, Massachusetts so far is also represented by a pair of perpetual losers: Jill Stein of Lexington and Your E-mail Daddy, Shiva Ayyadurai of Cambridge.

Before Ayyadurai can get on any ballots as an independent, though, he first has to win a lawsuit he filed in federal court in Washington, DC against Merrick Garland in which he argues the 14th Amendment gives him the right to run for president even though he was born in India. Not much has happened with the suit, except that it was recently transferred from Judge Tanya Chutkan (yes, the Trump Jan. 6 judge) to Judge Loren AliKhan, right after AliKhan was sworn in as a federal judge on Dec. 13.

H/t Garfield Collapse Cult for alerting us to Picard's presence on the ballot.