Moving more seventh graders from school buses to the T has general worked very well, but Assistant Superintendent Kim Rice told the School Committee that she's heard from a number of girls that they're not feeling all that safe on the T, in particular because of issues such as catcalling.
Rice said she and other officials plan to spend time figuring out what to do about that.
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What is new is that it is no longer tolerable
By anon
Thu, 09/10/2015 - 11:24am
For most of my adult life I have frequently overheard men walking in front of me mention how pretty, how nice or offering some other seriously stupid come on to a woman walking by him.
My questions and observations:
What can I do? Tell the guy to shut up? I could and possibly wind up harmed.
Tell the woman that was unacceptable behavior on his part and get a, "Mind own you business."
Note the event, note that the man didn't touch her and accept it as the gross behavior of that one guy?
Couple of other observations:
I've seen and heard this particular situation only when it is young black male coming on to a young black woman. While men in general at construction sites are notorious for cat calls what makes it acceptable for some black men to come on to young black women in much closer proxmity? If it is white guys as well then I just have not see that.
My conclusion is that while men in general, particularly in the construction business, believe sexual harrasment is okay from a distance, that for some young black men it's okay to verbally press himself on any woman he wants to come on to when passing in close quarters on the street. I have not seen latin or white men engage in the same subtle harrassment but I take that to be just a matter of limited exposure to neigbhorhoods where latin and white men would verbally sexually harrass women in close proximity.
Perhaps what is needed is to apply the same sexual harrassment to men who see women (youngers and older) as their prey. Help them to experience the same fear and intimidation that they cause.
sigh
By anon
Thu, 09/10/2015 - 1:08pm
1) Boys being sexually assaulted isn't uncommon.
2) Sexual harassment (as opposed to flirting), directed at a guy will generally elicit a different type of response, given that males are biologically more aggressive.
Respect is a two way street. Both males and females should respect one another unless given a reason not to. Now, if some woman started copping an attitude with me, of worse, start screaming or yelling, claiming she felt 'uncomfortable' with me (as another poster suggested should occur), whenI did nothing, and she is perhaps unstable, it would not end well.I know I certainly wouldn't just lie down and take it just because of her gender. Arbitrary, and false, accusations in our society and others are unfortunately commonplace.Here in MA 350 years ago we had people executed for being witches because of ridiculous accusations made by young women. The phrase witch hunt obviously derives from these witchcraft trials and executions.
My brother was told me a story a few years ago about how he was about to drive away from a parking lot when he observed what appeared to be a guy assaulting (hitting) a woman. He watched for a minute, then decided he should intervene. The woman being assaulted promptly started assaulting my brother,screaming at him to leave her boyfriend alone. So anyone who wonders why many do not I intervene in such a situation, this is one of the reasons why.
You are discussing issues you
By anon
Thu, 09/10/2015 - 2:43pm
You are discussing issues you have with women. The issue at hand is about young girls
White men do not like to be
By 2
Thu, 09/10/2015 - 2:47pm
White men do not like to be noticed when they're being predatory. In my experience, they either:
1. Call out from their cars.
2. Take pictures, also from their cars (so creepy, jesus christ). The last pair who did this to me kept trying to "placate" me by telling me how beautiful I was, while laughing at me when I told them to delete the picture and that their actions made me very uncomfortable. This was in a public setting (off of Green St in JP) and no one said or did anything on my behalf.
3. Invade intimate space in a crowded setting & whisper. Then, they'll turn around and get super defensive and loud if you call them out.
I am a Black woman who has lived in multiple types of neighborhoods on different socioeconomic scales from the racially diverse to predominately one race in two countries. Pretty sure I've, unfortunately, been catcalled by men of every race at this point.
An eye for an eye (which is basically what you're calling for) is not going to work because in our society, men do not fear women, men are not sexually nor physically intimidated by women, and men think that being catcalled would be a positive experience. Like, how many stupid bros have you heard say something like, "I would love it if women sexually objectified me!" (real life experience, btw). They do not have to do the quick thinking of "Should I say something?" "Will someone back me up if I do?" "This is a crowded space, so I can be loud and he won't be threatening", or "Will he follow me if I say anything?" that women have to.
Personally, I believe that we first and foremost need to raise men who respect women and not just respect them long enough to get them into bed. They need actually see us as whole human beings like they do of their fellow man.
More importantly, men also need to get in on this and call out their boys, cousins, uncles, classmates, etc when they see them disrespecting another woman. When a guy is in a group and he either laughs or silently does nothing when he sees a woman being catcalled, he is actually positively enforcing the other man's behavior. What men don't realize is that when they say/do nothing, they've actually silently telegraphing to the woman that *they* are not be trusted, either.
Basically, men need to call other men out for being tools because lord knows they aren't trying to listen to anything a woman has to say.
a propos of "not much"
By be
Thu, 09/10/2015 - 7:40pm
A neighbor I'd not seen in a while told me, "Oh Bev! You look like you lost some weight!"
Does this fit under "Fat Shaming," "Illness Shaming," or what?
(The friend I ran into Being a Female, so not quite "Go To Jail Directly.")
idk
By Malcolm Tucker
Thu, 09/10/2015 - 9:20pm
Did she frame it as a good/desirable thing? That is to say: "You look great! Have you lost weight?"
As a bad thing? "Oh, Bev, are you okay? Have you lost some weight?"
Or just as a statement of (what she presumed to be) fact? "Hey, you lost weight."
If the first: hard to say. Obviously, women are conditioned to think they need to take up less space*, and it's all part of a patriarchal impulse to control female bodies. Female weight loss is therefore almost always presented as desirable, unless it gets to an unappealing extreme. Even women can express internalized misogyny - albeit often without realizing it.
If the second: probably comes from a place of concern, possibly concern-trolling. Hard to say.
If the third: perhaps your neighbor is just very literal.
*That is, they are now. I realize that there used to be a time when a fleshier female form was celebrated, but we haven't been celebrated for strength and power - at least not in the Western world - for a long time, if ever. It's always been about weakness and passivity, whether thin or fat.
This being the Innernets and all,
By be
Fri, 09/11/2015 - 2:17am
I'd respond as I normally do to an annoying asshole:
Fuck You, Go Away.
***
Girls in the city (and I was one of them at one point) used to know how to deal with this sort of stuff. Am sort of behind the times as to how the culture's changed, so Apologies in Advance for Having Possibly Offended.
This said: A young woman was recently found beaten to death in Nepal for her iPhone. Maybe one should start thinking more in terms of people being safe globally, rather than trying to find offence locally?
Depends. How fat were you?
By Heather
Fri, 09/11/2015 - 4:51pm
Depends. How fat were you?
OUR CHILDREN ARE NOT SAFE ANYMORE
By BORN AND RAISED...
Wed, 09/16/2015 - 11:55am
Children should be worried, when my daughter went to the Dearborn Middle School, coming through Dudley Station to catch the #66 bus, a drunky man grabbed her by her arm and her brother and cousin was standing near her hand to protect her imagine if they were not there, after that she became afraid to travel alone, and on another occasion 3 boys approached my son and asked him where was he from he said Haiti, they thought he was from Forest Hill area. It is not safe for the elderly and children were in a time where we are dealing with a group of thugs male and female with a lack of respect for anyone young or old. this is not life this is what life has become. Cat calling is not okay, when you are a young girl and some nasty old grown pervert is trying to hit on you.
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