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Lamborghinis are temperamental beasts; not everyone can drive one
By adamg on Tue, 02/18/2020 - 9:47am
Kristin MacDougall reports:
My mom says that two Lamborghinis were stolen and crashed into each other in front of Pisa Pizza in Malden this morning.
WFXT fills in the details:
Investigators were searching for two Lamborghini SUVs were stolen from a luxury car dealership in Wayland overnight after thieves reportedly smashed through the glass-front entrance, grabbed the keys and made off with vehicles.
Malden, Malden, why does that sound so familiar?
Oh, yeah, the baby wheel guys are from there. Oh, and remember the guys who claimed they found the Red Sox ALCS banner after it "fell off a truck"? Yeah, Maldonians.
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Comments
It was a getaway car chase
I was walking to the Malden T on Pearl when I saw the two cars going south on Pearl towards Charles Street—there was a loud sound of the engine revving, and one of the cars tried to pass the other on the left (bad idea, Pearl Street is not that wide). I saw 2-3 police cars chasing them with lights and sirens blaring. And then I heard the crunching sound of the crash coming from in front of Pisa Pizza.
after the crunch...
Apparently one of the thieves made a run for it, following which we had low-flying helicopters buzzing Malden Center. Good times.
The loud crunching sound
That sound was not just the two Ridicucars hitting each other, but the lead one crashing into an innocent motorist. From the XFT link:
The 2 joyriders deserve being charged with ADW.
Why drive them into the city?
Heck, I'd have taken those sweet rides somewhere I could let them run!
Lamborghini SUVs?
Isn't that an oxymoron?
The news report refers to them as sports cars, but SUV sports car doesn't seem possible.
Abomination
A Lamborghini SUV is indeed an abomination, but abominations exist in the world, and this is one of them. The Lamborghini Urus, named after the Greek god of pissing on all good things, was introduced in 2018.
Perhaps these two fine gentlemen are sports car purists, who want to remove this abomination from the world. If so, you couldn't choose a more appropriate gesture than to crash two of them into each other.
AMEN!!!
I was just discussing this complete abomination with a friend this past weekend. And while were are at it, let's throw the Porsche SUV in there too. You will NEVER find me driving these Gas Guzzling Turds.... (Maybe because I can't afford them, but that is another issue altogether....)
It's where they make all their money though
Porsche makes most of its money from SUV sales to support the sports cars. Lambo is just going for the same money.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/cars/2020/01/22/porsche-cayenne-mac...
(I know it's USA Today but the facts are facts)
Not the first Lamborghini SUV
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lamborghini_LM002
When I grew up, my neighbor
When I grew up, my neighbor had two Lamborghinis. Their top speed was around 18 MPH, but they were much more useful for plowing the fields and spreading cow manure than racing through the streets of Malden.
They looked more like this one.
Ferruccio Lamborghini's factories were building tractors before they were building cars. The story goes that Ferruccio started building cars after complaining about his mediocre Ferrari. In response, he was insulted by Enzo Ferrari who told him that “the problem is not with the car but with driver!” and went on to advise him to look after his tractors instead.
One sexy tractor
I gotta say, that's a sexy lookin' tractor though.
Sounds like a sequel or
Sounds like a sequel or prequel to that Porsche ad from the Superbowl this year.
Even more Malden fun!
Brianna Romero from the earlier UHub story "Three women charged as aggro Downtown Crossing stompers" https://www.universalhub.com/crime/20200216/three-women-charged-aggro-tr... is from--DING DING DING--Malden!
"Romero was also charged with possession of a Class B substance for the small plastic bag containing "a substance believed to be cocaine" found on her during booking."
Isn't she the daughter of Michelle Romero--a top Malden city official?
What are you getting at here
What are you getting at here re Malden? You’re quick to label folks as bigots for various reasons, and yet here you’re the one implying that all people from Malden tend to be criminals because ... what?
Maldonians?
How about Maldenarians?
I believe
They call themselves Maldenites and they are known for their quilt making.
Maldenizens
Maldenizens would be my choice.
I’d go with
Maldoons
"grabbed the keys"
As someone who once worked at dealerships, these guys did not simply grab those particular keys and take off. Large dealers have electronic boxes that you must log in with a user/password to take and return keys (and plates), and you would have to know to use the stock number to find the keys for those particular cars. Those dummies had help, and still screwed up.