Okie in a Volvo charged with driving 1,600 miles to try to blow up the Satanic Temple in Salem

An alleged Christian who prefers Old Testament nomenclature was arrested in Oklahoma today on charges he tossed an IED at the headquarters of the Satanic Temple in Salem on April 8.

The pipe bomb - a two-foot-long section of PVC pipe stuffed with smokeless gunpowder and covered with nails taped to it - more fizzled than exploded and so did relatively little damage after Sean Patrick Palmer, 49, tossed it at the Temple's front door, according to an affidavit by an FBI agent on the case.

According to the affidavit by Special Agent Osama Khudari, this might have been Palmer's second trip to Witch City and the Satanic Temple's Bridge Street headquarters: Perkins left a note in the shrubs outside the building that started: "ELOHIM SEND ME 7 MONTHS AGO TO GIVE YOU PEACEFUL MESSAGE TO HOPE YOU REPENT." Salem Police reported that in September, seven months ago, somebody had spray painted "JOHN 3:16-20, PSALM 141, ACTS 3:19" on the side of the building.

Palmer, from the affidavit:

According to the affidavit, Palmer, an active participant in a private Facebook group called "Crushing all Atheist, Evolutionist, and Muslim Arguments," got some PVC pipe and an end cap at "a national home improvement retailer" in Stillwater, OK, about 15 minutes north of his home, on April 3, then drove up here from his Perkins home, about 60 miles northeast of Oklahoma City.

Once he crossed into Massachusetts, he did not drive directly to Salem, according to the affidavit. State Police license scanners caught his black Volvo in Randolph, all the way on the other side of Boston, at 1:52 a.m. on April 8 and then Lynn at 2:21 a.m.

Surveillance video obtained by the FBI after the failed bombing showed him entering Salem around 2:41 a.m. He then drove around Salem for about 90 minutes before pulling up on a street near the Satanic Temple, where he got out, walked over and used a lighter to ignite the pipe bomb, which he then tossed at the Temple building, according to the affidavit.

And then, he raced back to his car and tried to book it out of Salem, only since he's not from around there, he promptly got confused by the local roads:

As the vehicle approached the Essex Bridge, it turned and began traveling south in the northbound travel late. The car then reversed, entered the correct travel lane, and continued driving south. It appears from these videos, therefore, that the driver of the car was likely not familiar with the Salem area.

In addition to the IED, Palmer left behind a grammatically challenged note that read:

DEAR SATANIST
ELOHIM SEND ME 7 MONTHS AGO TO GIVE YOU
PEACEFUL MESSAGE TO HOPE YOU REPENT. YOU SAY
NO, ELOHIM NOW SEND ME TO SMITE SATAN AND I
HAPPY TO OBEY. AND ELOHIM WANT ME TO CONTACT
YOU TO TELL YOU REPENT. TURN FROM SIN. ELOHIM
NO LIKE THIS PLACE AND PLAN TO DESTROY IT. MAYBE
SALEM TOO? ELOHIM SEND ME TO FIGHT CRYBABY
SATAN, BUT WANT ME TO MAKE HARD EFFORT SO NO
ONE DIES. I OBEY.

Despite its name, members of the Satanic Temple do not actually believe in Satan: "To embrace the name Satan is to embrace rational inquiry removed from supernaturalism and archaic tradition-based superstitions. "

According to the affidavit, investigators found two hairs with the pipe bomb: One that they have identified as belonging to a Caucasian man and one belonging to a dog with dark hair. Palmer, the affidavit continues, is a white guy who has a dog with dark hair.

Palmer, who will make his first court appearance in Oklahoma City federal court tomorrow, was formally charged with using an explosive to cause damage to a building used in interstate or foreign commerce, the US Attorney's office in Boston says. If convicted, Palmer faces up to 20 years in federal prison.

Innocent, etc.