The Quincy Patriot Ledger reports police arrested a man they caught masturbating in a Quincy Center parking lot outside two different restaurants on two consecutive days - and that when they put him in lockup, he started right up again. He faces a variety of charges.
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Reminds me of...
By Lunchbox
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 5:58pm
Patient goes for his annual physical. Doctor says, "I don't know how to tell you this, but you have to start masturbating."
"Why?" says the patient.
"So I can start the examination..."
It's about time he showed some balls
By Waquiot
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 10:28pm
Wait, this is the immigration thing, right?
(TINY EDIT- Adam changed the teaser on the article before this so that it actually references the immigration thing as opposed to this story, which makes my reference kind of odd. Still, I won't change what I wrote. Speaking of tiny edit...
You know, we laugh at this guy, but... that's what we do.)
Feel Bad
By BostonDog
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 6:49pm
Not to excuse his actions, but he's suffering some serious mental health problems.
Feel for him
By Bugs Bunny
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 7:01pm
That he needed to buy a magazine for it.
A Magazine?
By Saddlebrook7
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 9:44pm
How quaint. Do they even print skin mags anymore?
Not that I would know
By anon
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 11:09pm
but, yes
The judge will deal with his case firmly
By Ron Newman
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 8:46pm
Unlikely
By BostonDog
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 9:07pm
For most judges, being assigned this case would be a real let down and they be inclined to go soft on him.
Of course, the right judge might rise to the occasion and rule in favor of a stiff punishment.
Depends
By SwirlyGrrl
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 10:49pm
The hearings on whether he is up for a trial might take more than four hours. Otherwise, he'll be yanked into the mental health system.
Truth being, of course, stranger than fiction....
By Bob Leponge
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 10:53pm
... he could always hope for this judge:
http://www.abajournal.com/news/article/ex_judge_di...
It seems like no matter how
By Ahab
Tue, 01/31/2017 - 9:40pm
It seems like no matter how hard they try, they can't seem to penile-ize this guy..
Reporting can be a hard job
By Daan
Wed, 02/01/2017 - 8:30am
but Adam, to his credit, never leaves us with a turgid writing or comes across with a tumescent ego. We get just the hard, sometimes hot, sometimes warm, but never flaccid facts.
Warning**
By Scauma
Wed, 02/01/2017 - 8:57am
Tons of bad puns below..I expect better from the UHub community.
Was this outside the Penalty Box?
By Lanny Budd
Wed, 02/01/2017 - 12:30pm
and did Eddie Shore send him?
Sounds mentally ill.
By anon
Thu, 02/02/2017 - 7:03pm
Sounds mentally ill.
Clearly what this guy needs is a lifetime criminal record and sex offender registration.
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