A not offended citizen filed a 311 complaint about "a massive cock," of the rubber sort, suction-cupped to a traffic sign at H and Emerson streets in South Boston this afternoon, along with a photo showing "Happy New Year!" written on one side of the shaft. The filer checked "not offensive" on the complaint form.
Note: The city removed the original complaint from the 311 system, but, of course, nothing on the Internet ever dies; see below for the original complaint.
Neighborhoods:
Topics:
Free tagging:
| Attachment | Size |
|---|---|
 If you want to see it ... | 263.96 KB |
| See the original complaint | 41.81 KB |
Like the job UHub is doing? Consider a contribution. Thanks!
Ad:
Comments
That sign suffers not...
By Friartuck
Mon, 01/04/2021 - 10:42pm
the Irish curse.
Penis on street sign
By Mr02119
Mon, 01/04/2021 - 10:54pm
Definitely not a cursed Irishman. Probably black Irish!
The Irish Curse is a myth
By anon
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 9:32am
As a proud Irish American from a large family of 7 kids, I can tell you that there are showers and growers in the Irish American community. Either way, the results are effective. The Irish Curse is largely a myth.
Dirk Diggler
By SwirlyGrrl
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 11:52am
I think this is more Dirk Diggler, given the skin tone.
I can't speak for my Irish descendants,
By anon
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 9:57am
but my endowment is above average.
Then again, I have English, Spanish (great grandfather), and even a Polish Jewish ancestor.
They don't call it City Point
By MC Slim JB
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 12:20am
for nothin'.
Ok.... I have to admit, that
By Dawn
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 12:33am
Ok.... I have to admit, that’s pretty funny.
Detachable penis
By Kaz
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 1:36am
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable...
https://youtu.be/byDiILrNbM4
Not funny.
By DotRat4Eva
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 6:25am
This is not funny
Counterpoint: Yes it is.
By ZachAndTired
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 9:12am
Counterpoint: Yes it is.
Umm.
By DotRat4Eva
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 12:34pm
No. It’s not.
no really
By Lisfnord
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 12:37pm
...it is
Nah ah
By DotRat4Eva
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 12:39pm
Nah ah.
It's missing a lengthy foreskin...
By Friartuck
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 12:47pm
But otherwise it's an A+
This isn't an argument
By SwirlyGrrl
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 1:25pm
This is contradiction!
Room 12
By adamg
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 1:37pm
Excellent!
By Frelmont
Tue, 10/22/2024 - 8:57pm
Excellent!
(No subject)
By ZachAndTired
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 12:44pm
[img]https://media.giphy.com/media/QU4ewgcmdcsObx9CG7/g...
You're right...it's actually
By anon
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 10:37am
You're right...it's actually hysterical. I would have laughed so hard (pun intended?) if I had seen that. Probably would have taken a selfie with it.
Before the "WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN" crowd...if you see it w/ your kid you explain what it is - you don't ignore it, rush them away or make it dirty. It's a body part. Let's make America not so sexually repressed.
Yep. How this would actually go:
By Tim Mc.
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 2:27pm
"Papa, that sign has a penis!"
"Haha, yep."
"Why?"
"Maybe someone thought it was funny."
"hahahaha"
and then they would get distracted by a squirrel or something.
Not funny.
By Wiffleball
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 12:06pm
♫ Penis on a street sign, I know
I know it's serious
Penis on a street sign, I know
I know it's really serious. ♫
Ha
By Parkwayne
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 1:30pm
I would rather not go
Back down to Southie
I would rather not go
Back down to Southie
There's too many big dildos
Too many dildos there
Take it down and throw it away
By East side Chuck
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 8:06am
Seems silly to file a 311 complaint and ask the city to schedule a maintenance worker to take care of this. This person wasted more time taking a picture than if they had just grabbed a stick, knocked the dang thing down, and threw it in the trash barrel. This is YOUR neighborhood! Have some pride and take care of this stuff on your own and we will all have a nicer city to live in.
Only if you have disposable gloves
By adamg
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 9:20am
You don't know where that thing's been.
Oh I think we do know where
By OH
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 10:57am
Oh I think we do know where it's been.
Lighten up Francis!
By Jonathan
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 9:40am
Lighten up Francis!
But then we wouldn't get to see it
By Tim Mc.
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 10:11am
and the maintenance worker wouldn't have a funny story to tell (to say nothing of missing out on a great hood ornament.)
Sometimes in life, someone
By Make Boston Bus...
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 11:05am
Sometimes in life, someone take the silly route and we're all richer for it.
Treat discarded sex toys like syringes... please...
By Friartuck
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 2:29pm
Leave it to the professionals.
Nonsense
By Tim Mc.
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 2:51pm
You could even handle it with bare hands as long as you washed your hands well afterwards.
They're not, like... sharp or anything.
Sure, Jan...
By Friartuck
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 4:33pm
Vaginal discharge, fecal matter, semen, blood...
It's like holding a strap on the MBTA minus the snot...
I was with you at first
By eeka
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 7:00pm
But I ride the MBTA all the time and have yet to encounter anyone holding a strapon.
I mean, I'd sure recommend wearing gloves
By Tim Mc.
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 7:35pm
but it's not like you need a professional to deal with it.
The ppl who show up from
By Lmo
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 8:27pm
The ppl who show up from public works “I’m not fucking touching that thing”
Violation
By SamWack
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 8:15am
The rubber appendage seems to be violating the directive of the sign to which it is attached.
Just as well
By adamg
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 9:22am
Peyronie's Disease can be painful, I've heard.
I wouldn't say it's massive
By StillFromDorchester
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 9:04am
Impressive, but not massive. :)
Not art.
By Scratchie
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 1:46pm
Not art.
Proud boy!
By SwirlyGrrl
Wed, 01/06/2021 - 1:34pm
Oooh. Now that's a proud boy!
Update 1-5 2:37 pm
By anon
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 2:39pm
I clicked on the link to the report to see if it had been resolved. Status is "Report not available"
I hope someone saved a screenshot.
Of course
By adamg
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 3:23pm
It's now attached to the original post above as "original complaint."
No dildoes on 311
By adamg
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 3:21pm
Looks like the city's taken down the 311 complaint about the rubber item.
Be careful with the terminology
By Bob Leponge
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 9:35pm
Only items made here using locally sourced materials are properly covered by that term. Otherwise it's properly termed a generic "phalloid sex toy"
[img]https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/f...
Get yours at
By jmeltzer
Wed, 01/06/2021 - 1:21am
the yard sale.
I believe the proper term for erstaz phalluses produced
By MC Slim JB
Wed, 01/06/2021 - 9:34am
outside the Dildo Appellation d’Origine Contrôlée is "sparkling marital aids."
Revised
By SwirlyGrrl
Wed, 01/06/2021 - 1:35pm
"Sparking self-care items".
Universal Chub
By BannedFromTheRoxy
Tue, 01/05/2021 - 9:42pm
Universal Chub
Thank you
By MissDee
Wed, 01/06/2021 - 12:16pm
I needed my laugh for the day.
Add comment